My Nanny Ruth passed away last week. She was 91, and lived a beautiful, full life, but when you love someone as much as I love her, there is never enough time. Oh! how deeply I miss her already. This past week has been blurry and kind of dreamlike. It seems impossible that we’ve lost her – that I won’t see her sparkly, warm eyes again. I’ve been comforting myself with reminders that she will always be present within me, and that I can see her in my daughters’ red hair, their smiles, their compassion. I also take comfort in knowing that Nanny was a journalist and archivist; we have boxes and boxes of letters, invitations, awards, notes, cards, drawings, and journals. She and my Papa Joe drove on a long cross country trip, and every single evening she wrote in her journal about that day’s adventure. One day, Tom and I plan to RV camp our way across the country following in their exact footsteps.

And, she kept a “baby book” for me. Get this – her last entry was in 2010! Hello, treasure! The best part is that within the 34 years of her detailed accounts of my life are little love messages reminding me to be happy, to stay close with my family, telling us how much she loves us. She is comforting me now, even though she is gone. That is so my Nanny.

Everything that was hers, everything she touched and looked at and loved, everything she wrote and doodled, everything I remember about her are my treasures. There really are so many.

xo e

p.s. Check out the gold peace sign that she is wearing in the above picture. My Papa Joe wore that every single day under his shirts, and when he passed away, Nanny wore it.